During a family dinner discussion about weekend plans, Charlie couldn’t help finishing his mom’s thoughts before she had finished her sentences.
"We'll be leaving on Friday at—" "I know right after school,” Charlie interjected eagerly. His mom forced a smile, struggling to maintain her train of thought. "Yes, and then we will go hiking…" Charlie then blurted out, "at Western Shores State Park like we always do. Good plan, mom." "No, I was going to say that we should hike at the Point. Let me finish my thought, Charlie. We might go to the beach on Sunday, but it depends…." "If it rains.." Charlie interrupted again, his excitement palpable. “I already checked the weather, Should be okay.”
Mom took a deep breath, her patience wearing thin.
As a parent, dealing with constant interruptions from your child can be incredibly frustrating. Understanding why your child interrupts and learning how to help them interrupt less can improve family communication and avoid stressful conversations.
Why Your Child Interrupts Too Much
Fast brains
Children who interrupt a lot usually have speedy brains. This can be an asset to them in so many ways but also leads to them getting ahead of somebody they are speaking with and interrupting them. People with fast brains think that they know where the conversation is going but sometimes jump to conclusions and get it wrong. Also, most people who get interrupted interpret it as a sign of disrespect even when it is not meant that way.
Working Memory
Another reason children interrupt is due to issues with their working memory. If they don’t get their point across immediately, they fear they will forget it, which can result in the impulse to blurt it out. Sometimes, children who interrupt are so focused on what they want to say that they have difficulty tuning into what the other person is saying. One study found that children with poor working memory often exhibit inattentive behaviors, including short attention spans and high distractibility, which can further lead to interruptions during conversations.
Limited Self-Awareness
Children often have limited self-awareness and may not realize how their interruptions affect others. Constantly blurting out your thoughts can disrupt the flow of conversations or make it challenging for others to express their thoughts. Developing self-awareness also comes with age but can also be related to our ability to self-monitor, which is often a challenge for children with ADHD.
Strategies to Help Your Child Interrupt Less
Build Self-Awareness
Help your child become more aware of their interrupting behavior. Guide them to notice when they feel the urge to interrupt and to consciously pause before speaking. You can create a simple "interruption tracker" where they mark down each time they catch themselves about to interrupt. This visual representation can help them see their progress over time and become more mindful of their behavior.
Slowing down their brain
When kids interrupt, it might indicate that their brains are too busy or going into overdrive. If this is the case, help them regulate by taking slow, deep breaths together, decreasing your rate of speech, and allowing them to express their ideas first. This can help them relax, making it easier for the both of you to have a flowing conversation.
Have Them Write Down What They Need to Say
If your child struggles to wait their turn in conversations because they're afraid of forgetting what they have to say, encourage them to write their ideas down. This is especially useful in classrooms or group discussions. Provide them with a notebook and pen, and remind them to raise their hand to show their intent to share instead of blurting out (if they can helpt it!)
Teach Them to Recognize Conversation Breaks
Conversations are a delicate dance that comes naturally to some people but can be more of a learned skill for others. If your child struggles with finding the rhythm in conversations and often interrupts, help them learn to identify natural pauses or breaks. You may practice this skill through role playing or watching videos together. Pause to point out when characters take turns speaking or when there are natural breaks in the dialogue.
Advocate for Themselves and Educate Others
If your child has ADHD traits affecting impulse control, empower them to advocate for themselves during social interactions. Teach them to explain to others that they mean no disrespect if they interrupt; they are just trying to slow down their speedy brains.
Give them the tools and vocabulary to educate family members, teachers, and other key people in your child's life about how ADHD can affect inhibition. This will help others understand that interruptions are not an attempt to dominate the conversation but more of an associated trait that comes with executive dysfunction.
Remember that every child is unique, and what works for one may not work for another. Be patient and willing to try different strategies until you find what works best for your child. With consistent practice, most children can significantly improve their conversation skills and reduce interruptions over time.
If your child continues to struggle significantly with impulse control, consider consulting with an executive function coach. Habit Coach can provide tailored strategies to support your child in this area of need.
