Every time I walk into my child’s room at night, they are watching YouTube or playing videogames instead of doing their homework. Should I have them sit next to me when they are doing their homework so I can keep track of them?

Coach Jon’s Answer: All kids and adults have daily distractions that may prevent them from finishing tasks. We all have fun websites a browser-tab away, notifications and texts coming in on our phones, and steady interruptions by family members or friends. If your child has challenges with Getting Started or Focus & Follow-Through, it might be even harder to resist these distractions.  Micromanaging their homework could work in the short term if you are willing to put up with the conflict that it may create, but it is unlikely to work in the long-term. Monitoring a child by having them sit next to you takes the responsibility off of the child and transfers it to you. Sooner or later, your child needs to develop the ability to push aside distractions and get their work done. We know kids whose parents micromanage their homework the whole way through high school and as soon as they go off to college, the wheels fall off and these kids can’t get their work done.

A better strategy is to meet with your child once or twice a week and ask them to tell you what homework they have due that week and what their plan is to get it done. Make sure you know how to get into their Google Classroom, Schoology or whatever homework system the school may use so you can see deadlines and any overdue work. This may require you to put homework slots on a Google Calendar or build a list of homework times and assignments with them. Hold them accountable for getting the work done, but manage their output not their input. 

This is a great topic for a child to work with one of our coaches on. Learning to Get Started and to Follow-Through takes a lot of technique, encouragement, and practice. With a parent, it can feel like nagging but with a coach, it can go more smoothly.