Preparing her son, Alex, for the first day of middle school was a big job for Jenny Thomas. She made sure he had a new backpack, his first phone, his first laptop, notebooks, pencils, and a water bottle. She meticulously labeled all these items with permanent markers, knowing that Alex was prone to losing stuff.
On Alex's first day at school, she waved goodbye and kissed him farewell, out of sight of any other kids. “I’m in 6th grade now, Mom. No public kissing,” declared Alex. Later that day, Jenny received a text message from Alex, “Mom, I lost my phone.” By day two, it was, “Mom, I lost my water bottlel?” On day three, Alex came home without his backpack.
Every night, Jenny imagined the school’s Lost and Found pile growing larger, filled with Alex’s personal things. Jenny sometimes laughed at how ridiculous it was that her son loses things so often, but deep inside, she wondered if he will ever learn to take care of his belongings independently.
Losing things, a common sign of executive dysfunction, can be incredibly frustrating for both children and parents alike. It not only leads to stress and conflicts but can also cause financial strain, especially when more valuable items like devices or jewelry are misplaced. If you're looking to help your child lose things less often, here are some tips to share with them.
Strategies to Teach Your Child
1. Place objects in spots where they are less likely to forget them.
Have them strategically place their belongings in a visible and easily accessible location. For instance, when you're at the movies with your child, tell them to place their coat on their lap instead of on the back of the chair. This way, it's visible and less likely to be forgotten. Remember, out of sight, out of mind! In sight, in mind!
2. Make use of technology.
Apple AirTags and other Bluetooth trackers are valuable tools for helping kids keep track of their belongings more effectively. These trackers can be securely attached to items such as backpacks, water bottles, or keys. By using a smartphone app, both parents and children can easily locate misplaced items by pinpointing their exact location. This capability not only reduces the stress of searching for lost items but also promotes responsibility in maintaining personal belongings. Enabling location services and "Find My iPhone" capabilities can also provide added security if a child misplaces their device.
3. Invest in storage and organization.
Teach kids the importance of giving everything a specific place to call home. Provide designated spots for items to avoid misplacing them. To minimize clutter, use trays or caddies on desks to organize pens, pencils, and other school supplies. Label bins, baskets, or drawers with your child's name for storing specific items such as school supplies or toys. Implement shelving units or hanging organizers to neatly store clothes, shoes, and accessories, ensuring easy accessibility.
4. Use a backpack. Always.
If you have more than one item to carry, it's best to use a bag. Rather than hanging jackets on chairs or hooks, or temporarily storing items in desk compartments, encourage your child to place them in their backpack or pockets. This reduces the likelihood of forgetting things.
5. Make it a habit to double-check.
Encourage your child to double-check their belongings before leaving the room, including checking seat crevices, desk compartments, and the floor. Teach them the habit of immediately putting items away rather than just setting them down, reinforcing the practice of returning things to their designated places. For instance, if it only takes 30 seconds to return their earrings into the jewelry box instead of leaving them on the sink, encourage them to be more mindful of this.
6. Introduce a reminder mantra.
A simple, catchy phrase can serve as a quick cue for them to remember what they need to do. Teach your child mnemonics or simple phrase like "PBS" (Phone, Backpack, Suitcase) to remind them to check for essential items before leaving.
7. Teach responsibility through routine.
Establishing consistent habits can create a sense of structure and can be an effective way to help your child stop losing things. Set aside 30 minutes on the weekend for your child to tidy up and return items to their places. Allow them to make decisions about organizing and storing their items, and gradually increase their responsibility for their belongings.
If you'd like more tips and strategies to help your child lose things less often, HabitCoach is here to assist!
